“There is that speaketh like the piercings of a sword: but the tongue of the wise is health.” Proverbs 12:18
It was one of those situations she’d have to “whitewash” over time and time again. One coat would never come near to covering the hurt and humiliation. The careless words thrown her way weren’t dampened or silenced when they hit the floor of her heart with a giant thud. No, instead they echoed and bounced around in her thoughts as if someone had screamed out her name into a dark cave.
It would take much more than one coat of whitewash indeed! All she could hear now were the careless, harsh adjectives which were cruelly attached to a sentence including her name. She would never forget this moment. Never. The tears fell.
How often have we felt the sting of words in our lifetimes? How many times have we also heard, “They’re only words, not knives”. Yet, we all know the truth — words can cut to the quick in an instant. We have each experienced this pang of woe at one time or another. Children aren’t the only ones prone to suffer from verbal abuse, are they?
Sharing this concept with a small class of young men, I passed a canvas around that I’d filled with random words which carry with them the capability to belittle, discourage and bring shame. I ask them to circle any words that had been thrown their way, the ones that made them feel insecure or less-than. It wasn’t long until the canvas was filled with circles. Macho young men made themselves vulnerable enough to be honest and open with me. It was an amazing experience I’ll not soon forget.
We all know the power of negative words, don’t we? I’m sure you can still see some of the words on the canvas which you might circle yourself if given the opportunity to do so. We all know the value of positive reinforcement, but how often is it that us word users choose to tear down instead of build up?
A word, once spoken, can never be unheard again.
God bless those who teach us, as small children, that we are allowed to cover these humiliating words with God’s truth about us. I wish I could go back and realize the importance and necessity of this concept sooner. How many people’s lives would have turned out much different if someone’s hurtful words would’ve instantly been whitewashed with God’s words? What a different world we would live in.
That’s what we did next with the canvas; we covered those words up with layers of paint. Some words disappeared with only one coat, but we added a second and third coat — and some words still tended to seep through. It was a powerful demonstration of repeatedly applying God’s truthful words over our wounded hearts for them to be whole and healed. It’s not a one and done most of the time. We must remind ourselves and others over and over again of the truth, my friend.
We often fail to realize the damage small and invisible words can cause in each other’s heart.
I’ll never forget moments when my own heart felt it was pierced, will you? Can you “unhear” those words which might have led to feelings of insecurity? Intimidation? Fear? No! We even start believing ugly remarks are true after hearing them so many times over. After all, how does a puppy learn its name? By hearing it repeated over and over! Yeah, I know we’re not puppies but it makes a good point anyhow.
The good news is that we can quickly give hurtful words a coat of God’s whitewash to soothe any ache left behind. What a necessary lesson to master; His words are always true.
We are dearly loved, valued, fought for and even died for. There are endless verses which show us how much we are worth and wanted. Isn’t that what we like to be assured of? You see, we aren’t the sum total of the words spoken to or about us by others - past, present or future.
Let’s be kind and use our words gently. People need lifted up, encouraged and cheered on; there’s enough of the ugly stuff to go around already. Let’s help someone to be better today, not bitter. I know it’s up to the individual, yet let’s not be a stumbling block. Let’s choose to be a stepping stone and help to lift someone up a little higher. Together, we win.
We are victorious and more than conquerors. Let us keep in mind God’s canvas is filled with His own words of truth about us...and whitewash everything else.